A little girl, a kettle and the sea; and frog that woke up when the water was too hot

It is one of the littler and nicer stories I read as a child. And that was long ago – in the dim, distant past; when scientists were real scientists and they spent time in laboratories, constantly experimenting with stuff and making discoveries and turning up with inventions. 

They didn’t turn up in African capitals to fool entire governments – at the cost of billions – with fanciful tales about building factories to make illusory vaccines or phantom world class hospitals.

This was a real scientist who was experimenting on how best to boil a frog alive; without too much fuss.

He put a frog in a pot of hot water – and it jumped out immediately. Then he got a brainwave; and tried another way. He changed the hot water for cold. The frog settled in comfortably, and relaxed. 

It was a fair while before the temperature began to rise and when it did, there was no immediate concern, since it rose very            slowly. 

In fact, the water even felt good and nice and so warm, the frog began to dose. 

But soon the water got really hot and by that time, the frog could not jump out. It got cooked really nice. 

The other wee story was an American politician who took his little girl to the beach. Everything was going well… until it was time to go into the water. 

Try as he might, he couldn’t convince the lass to step into the water – too cold, she said. 

The fellow assured her he knew just what to do. He stepped back into the hotel and within a few minutes, returned with a kettle of freshly boiled water and with lots of pomp and pageantry, proceeded to empty the contents into the ocean. The little girl was impressed! 

Now totally persuaded that the ocean just got warmer, she stepped into the water without further question. Father and daughter dived into the sea. 

A gunslinger walks into town, takes charge and says not to worry; just four years and we’ll have elections. 

He’s just a freedom fighter, not a politician, he says. He’s not even interested in being here; just sacrificing himself, for the good of everyone. 

Four years later, he be like, “it’s still too early…give me another five years”. Still assuring people of his complete disinterest in the leadership project, he stands for the first election, which he wins because people are kind of rewarding him for restoring “democracy” and “stability”. 

Then he goes for another five-year term; his very last, he assures everyone. When it is over, he be like…as a revolutionary, why should my stay in power depend on a piece of paper called a constitution? 

Parliament, aided in no small measure by a few million shillings, agrees with him and… term limits are removed. Then the age limit provision of the Constitution catches up with the revolutionary. 

Again, with the help of a few more millions, Parliament removes the term limits. And when it seems like nature’s limitations (which cannot be amended) are catching up with him…a new project emerges – a son is warming up to replace him.

And his new placement as the one in charge of the ultimate instruments of coercion awakes people to the obvious reality: the gunslinger who professed complete disinterest in running the show had never, for all intents and purposes, intended to leave.

But by the time the unpleasant realisation hits home – that they’ve been taken for a ride all this time – it is too late. The water is now very hot, but the frog cannot jump out anymore. It is cooked.

How did we get here? Simple. Like the cunning and crafty American politician with his little petulant and pouting little girl, a bit of truth injected into a sea of lies will fool an entire population for 40 years and more.

Regimes like that are not outrightly despotic; nah. They sprinkle a few bits about democracy and decency here and there. They will do a bit of nice things here and there, once in a while. 

They will talk nice and smooth and occasionally do the right thing. But like the little girl, we focus on the kettle whose contents are being poured into the ocean – instead of analysing the bigger ocean.

Mr Gawaya Tegulle is an advocate of the High Court of Uganda, [email protected]