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Their marriages are thriving despite being in the limelight
What you need to know:
Despite living their marriage in the public eye, with all the challenges that this brings, these couples are making it work. They share their secrets with Promise Twinamukye
Celebrity couples do not have it easy when it comes to making a marriage work. The limelight ensures privacy is never fully met, and busy work schedules are bound to take time away from the happy couple.
However, while many celebrity marriages fail, there are plenty of famous couples who have stayed together despite the challenges.
The key is not to have the time, but to make the time for their partners in order to keep that close bond going even when work dictates you must be away from your partner for long periods of time.
These couples also share their Valentine’s Day plans.
Mathew and Eleanor Nabwiso
Married nine years
Her
This year is our 10-year wedding anniversary.
Good communication and being friends has kept us going for this long. It is the small details that we as friends put into consideration that remind us that we are a priority to each other. We confide in each other a lot so I know he has my back.
Marriage is what you make it. Is it a bed of roses? Yes because we made it a point to make sure it remains a bed of roses. We talk about our issues and say sorry where we must. We have aligned our responsibilities as a couple, friends and as parents so, we do not need to remind each other what we must do.
When we get misunderstandings, we choose to make corrections with a positive attitude and to help each other grow and make sure we are good in our different departments. Personally, I do not stay mad for long. I like to talk about an issue immediately and get it solved. Mathew always says, “we are in this for the long haul so you have to forgive me and we move on” which gets me laughing and I remember I cannot make a small issue look so big. All it takes is “sorry”.
February is a busy month for us. Mathew’s birthday is on the fourth and mine is on the 24th. So, Valentine’s Day coming in between is only a bonus. We always celebrate with family because to us, it is a day to celebrate love, even with the children. So, dinner or a getaway with the children is always our plan and will be the same this year.
Him
What has kept us going is staying friends and always doing things together. That includes going out when we can, among other things.
Marriage is not a bed of roses owing to the fact that as human beings we are different. However, in our house, we always take the trouble to understand or accept each other’s flaws.
Hannington and Esther Bujingo
Married 18 years
Him
Make sure you understand each other’s goals and plans for the relationship. She knows what I like and dislike and she respects my boundaries. I respect her interests as well. Respect is key in any marriage. I try as much as possible to be transparent and communicate as often as possible so I do not leave room for speculation.
After all these years of marriage, I cannot and have no reason to lie to her especially since she is now my best friend and confidant.
It is also important to know who you are and who your partner is before settling down with them. By the time you marry someone, you must have accepted their character and know that you can comfortably co-exist. Do not go into a marriage with the sole intention of changing one another since this will only lead to conflicts.
On Valentine’s Day, we normally go out for lunch or dinner. I also do not guess what she wants; I ask her and whatever she says is what I get. This, way I avoid buying something that she hates and will never use.
Her
Marriage is an institution and putting God first is what will make it succeed. I am a member of several prayer groups and through these, we are able to seek God’s hand in our marriages and family life.
Knowing what my husband likes has also helped me know how to live peacefully with him. He loves going out, he is an entertainer, and I am the complete opposite. I love staying in and enjoying a cup of tea. He knows that too and we respect each other’s space.
I understand that our home is not a prison and that he does not have to come back at a specific time. He is not in school or in his parents’ home anymore. He has to have his freedom in order for him not to feel suffocated at home.
I communicate a lot. I tell him what I want or feel because he is not God that he will know everything I need without telling him.
I keep in mind that he chose me and I him. Whatever challenges come my way, I know my worth and position in our marriage and I cannot compromise any of that for anything less.
Most partners tend to blame themselves when something goes wrong because they do not know their worth, making it easy to give up on the union. Temptations and rumours will always be there. Praying helps, especially when it comes to making sound decisions.
For Valentine’s Day, we usually go for a dinner or lunch date with the children and this will not be any different.
Milly Nassolo and Robert Tumushabe Kikomeko
Married seven years
Knowing each other’s strengths and weaknesses helps a couple create a formula that works only for them. What works for one couple may not necessarily work for another.
For us, making lasting memories every day is important. We do not wait for special days such as Valentine’s Day to go on dates or for vacations. Each day is special and must celebrated. Also, because we have an extended family, we have little time to ourselves and so, we make up for that during the getaways.
Knowing why you got married in the first place is also key. We did not get married just to give it a try. So, whatever happens, we know that we have to make it work. We understand that no one is perfect and misunderstandings are a part of every marriage. This way, in case of a misunderstanding, we sit and talk to each other, even if it means losing our tempers. Communication is key because it is through talking that you will be able to find a solution that works for both of you.
“I never ignore any of her questions even when I feel they are not worth answering. Men do not like explaining themselves but doing that makes things easier,” Robert says says.
As a couple, always pray but also remember that faith without works is dead. Make an effort to make things right between the two of you, talk things out, and explore new ways of doing something when one way fails.
Your marriage is between the two of you and no one else; not your children, the community, or even your respective families. Form a two way circle and solve your problems without involving anyone else. After all, too many cooks spoil the soup.
Valentine’s Day plans?
“I am not a morning person but he is. So, every Valentine’s Day, I wake up to a bouquet of flowers and whatever he has planned for the day is what I will do,” she says.
