When plane is crashing, but passengers are busy singing praises of the captain
Writer: Gawaya Tegulle. PHOTO/FILE
What you need to know:
- Forty years in power and police have no capacity to respond to deadly emergencies.
September 11, 2001...10hrs. Ring a bell, perhaps? Anyway, we were preparing to grab a bite when, without warning, the American Airlines B757 began a sharp descent, just a little short of a nosedive. Flying is beautiful, amazing and divine when all’s good; but I can assure you, an absolute nightmare when things go bonkers. We were flying from New Orleans to Chicago and had done an hour or so. People started screaming – even the cabin crew were scared.
I preferred to keep calm and pray. From my window seat, I scanned the earth below, to determine whether we were going to crash-land on a land or water surface. With each permutation, I worked out my plan for and chances of, survival. Details over coffee and sandwiches.
Something tells me, had the plane been full of Ugandans, they’d be happily singing and dancing like we used to, in high school, on school trucks: “Pilot yongeza omuliro! (Eeh, yongeza omuliro!). Pilot bwekulema olekula! (Eeh, bwekulema olekula!). That’s Luganda for: “Pilot, step on the gas! Pilot, if the vehicle goes out of control, just take your hands off the steering wheel!.
In less than three months, the National Resistance Movement (NRM) begins its 39th year in power. The balance sheet will show that all they have to show for public transport is hundreds of thousands of motorcycles (boda bodas) whose main contribution to our so-called “middle-income” economy has been to usher hundreds of people into the emergency wards of hospitals with broken heads and crushed legs, every day.
Those are the lucky ones; because every single day, in Kampala, at least six people die in boda boda accidents. If you don’t want to be killed in a boda boda accident, you have the luxurious option of dying in a “kamunye” (Kite) – commuter taxis that fly faster than demons and badly driven by chaps who wouldn’t recognise a driving school if they saw one. Oh, and these kamunyes are poorly maintained and just about unregulated on the road; they overtake anyhow and run roughshod over traffic officers. Good thing is, a kamunye gives you the chance to die in good company – at least 18 people crammed into that near-wreck of a vehicle.
Forty years in power and this is what the “mass party” with its wise, visionary leader has been able to invent. Uganda has 45 million people; but only the President has a vision for Uganda. The rest are just dimwits with no capacity to plan for the country. In 1986, Mr Museveni found a well-organised public transport system, with two public bus companies and a functional railway system that had been maintained by the “swine” who preceded him. He replaced all this with boda bodas and kamunyes. Great vision!
Forty years in power and all we see are chaotic towns; now being christened “cities”. The organised parts of these towns were built by our very bad and deplorable colonial masters, the British; and maintained by the “swine”. Very useless people! The only man with a vision for Uganda has improved these urban centres by adding slums and shanty towns. In the rich-man suburbs, you have beautiful houses, with no access roads; or with three-foot wide paths where only one vehicle can pass at a time. No urban planning. No roads. No organised development.
A few days ago, a fuel truck explodes and catches fire near the capital city, killing 16 as of yesterday. As usual, police are nowhere. Forty years in power and police have no capacity to respond to deadly emergencies; what they are good at is breaking up Opposition rallies and throwing innocent young people into jail on trumped-up charges. But Ugandans don’t care, they are celebrating Uganda’s “transformation” and asking for more. The plane is crashing...but passengers are happily singing the praises of the captain.
Mr Tegulle is an advocate of the High Court of Uganda.
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