How do you get the best out of your househelp?

Barbra had been a stay-at-home mother for a while, until recently when she got a job and has to find a househelp to babysit her two children, both under four years. But she is worried if the help will manage this responsibility.

If you have been a parent for any amount of time, you most likely have employed a househelp or maid as we call them. This is because you need an extra pair of hands to help with chores, the children and other things around the house.

Some househelps, probably the majority, are cast into this role by the hardships of life such as the early death of their parents or poverty in their homes.

Consequently, many lack formal education. Some may come with personality complexes, poor breeding, and in need of parental care despite their age. Some, however, may be mature, well-bred and parents themselves. Some know what to do. 

Whether they are residents or non-residents, everyone in your house is under your care and this includes the househelp. It is your job to motivate them, if you want the best out of them. It is a daunting task firing and hiring a new help every month as opposed to training the one you have for maximum output. This is how:         

Remunerate them well

It does not have to be a lot of money, but depending on your housework, you can agree with them on fairly good pay and pay them on time. Do not give excuses or take advantage of their vulnerability to delay or deny their dues.   

Do not discriminate them

It would be convenient to treat them as worthless or even as second-class family members, but when you remember that they are in charge of your food and children, then you owe it to yourself to treat them right.

While it is okay to have boundaries, do not subject them to inhumane treatment such as eating last and eating from the kitchen when everyone is on the dining table or living room. 

During family get-togethers, outings, birthdays, and picnics, allow them to be involved and blend in with the rest of the family. Remember they are far away from their own families and you do not want them to suffer from loneliness.    

Reward them

Once in a while, appreciate them beyond the salary they earn and gift them with something you know they like. Talk to them about their life’s passion and if you are able, support them in that direction but they must be the best they should be.

“My househelp got into a relationship that led her to marriage. We supported her as a family, buying most of the things she needed. I was even her maid of honour. She had been so good to me and my children that when it came to her big day, I could not stop at anything to make her happy” Agatha Mia says of her former help.     

Aid their learning

For some, it will be their first time working for someone in such situations. Not only do they need to learn the use of certain gadgets or appliances, they also need to learn how to relate to you and how you want certain chores done. How about you be kind to them and orient them. Show them around, show them where to find things they will be using, share with them your expectations of them and the rules around your home and any other thing they may need to know, so they can comfortably fit in.  

Respect them

“They are not inferior. Whether it is an appreciation, instruction, reprimand, or rebuke, communicate all gently given their dignity as persons. You cannot be disrespectful to them by calling them vulgar names and expect good service from them at the same time,” says Mr Uzairu Luzinda, the founder of Salespot, a jobs and marketing hub in Kampala.

Never lay your hand on them. They are not your children. Respect their privacy too. If they can have a separate room, that would be great. If you are suspicious they are stealing from you, have an honest conversation. And men in the home should not exploit them sexually. Respect their dietary restrictions too. If she is Muslim, respect her religious beliefs, do not force her to prepare pork.     

Do some chores too

Having a help does not mean that they should be overburdened with every little work there is to do. If you have children around, engage them in doing some chores to light the burden on the help, but also to learn to work themselves. For instance, on weekends, prepare your meals or clean the house yourself.

Be compassionate

If they have a personal issue, help them meet it if you are able. They may have a sick relative and they do not have the money to treat them. Chip in. They may be going through an emotional challenge, give them a listening ear. Forgive their faults. She may be addicted to TV, but she is good with your children, you can let that pass. Help them plan for their future, especially if they are still young.

Give them room to be creative

They do not have to depend on you for daily instructions, especially if they have lived with you for a long time and you have assessed that they are familiar with your style, family dynamics, and preferences and can handle autonomy. Depending on your observations and trust, a degree of autonomy to be creative in scheduling their duties and working around them should be left to them.