Who is your child talking to?

The message came through late in the night. The young man on the other end of the phone was asking if he could speak with me. The next day, we spoke on phone. As the conversation continued, he confided that he was in a very bad place. What bad place? I asked

He said he had cut off communication from everyone for several weeks and as his thoughts became overwhelming, he was thinking of ending his life. He lamented that he felt he did not want to be like his father neither did he want to upset his mother. According to him, life was meaningless and he wanted to give up.

Many a time, children are a reflection of adults in their lives. They go through their own experiences and interpret those experiences a certain way. I listen and engage with older children often, so I am usually surprised by their views on life.

Sometimes they exude an inflated sense of entitlement. They believe life must revolve around them. They feel entitled but completely hate the responsibility that comes with the entitlement. Other times, they feel grossly inadequate and many carry a very low sense of self-worth.

This situation is compounded by the fact that as parents, sometimes the children are unable to freely talk to us. It is a challenge to be a parent who has to discipline and disciple the child while at the same time, you are their friend and confidant.

What that means is that it is possible for the child to have a buildup of mixed emotions which they are unable to deal with and then they turn to their peers who are equally as challenged and confused. The result of that is often a depressed state with possibility of self-harm.

If there is one weapon a parent has, it is to deliberately and consistently pray for their children. Prayer works and it works powerfully. In a busy world with conflicting situations, we must seek divine wisdom. By our own ability, it is impossible to fend and know what your child is going through.

When the young man reached out to me, we spoke about many things, laughed but I also had the opportunity to help him see life from a different lens, which aided his understanding. We prayed together and his hope was restored.

I used to worry about who was standing with my children in spaces I could not stand with them. Then I began to pray that God sends the right people to them, to be their friends and mentors. Dear parent, find time and pray for your child. May your prayers be their cover in challenging times.