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Beware the rules of the game

“I’m sorry to say this but truthfully speaking, chicks are irritating.” I shot him a look of “Hello, you are speaking to a chick right now.” Quickly, he toned his disgusted face into a serious defensive one as he went on to explain. Apparently Maggie, the chick he is pushing out with, does not give him a moment’s peace. She texts him 24/7, bothering him with; “Where are you, what are you doing, who are you with, when can I see you...” - a million inquiries in so short a time.

Now, Tom got into this relationship to get over Paula, his first love and to him, his one and only soul mate. Then came along Margie, who badly demands that Tom should only have eyes for her, should only touch her and only flatter her. What she has not clicked yet is that she is not the only beauty around and that young love is like a game of cards; she is feeding Tom with jokers so he has to pick and play with more cards, in this case, more chicks.

Breathing space is the most important thing in a relationship and is what makes the whole commonly known as puppy-love affair interesting and fun. Space gives either party time to miss one another but again it should not be too much to cause drifting apart. In Maggie’s case, she is not allowing Tom breathing space so he feels like he is suffocating, disgusted and fed up.

One thing that people in relationships should do is trash nagging stunts. However, as much as there is something known as space, there should also be time for one another. Time that should not be interrupted or tampered with; time that is dedicated and booked. Well, some people have mob crazy love but whatever the case, don’t nag, be missed and have your cards right; no jokers.

The other thing is being appreciative. However short and brief the sms is, one at least took the time to type it. Okay, there are people who just plagiarise sweet stuff from the Internet, books and forwards but all the same, it’s worthwhile and better than nothing. For the guys, being sweet and romantic is a bonus mark. Texting her, calling her even when he’s broke, sending her airtime when she needs it, taking her to the movies, hugging her when saying bye, complimenting her looks and whatever else there is, buying her a gift or flower on Valentine’s and not forgetting her birthday; generally just being nice to her, is enough.

“He once bought me flowers on Valentine’s and threw them at me. It was so mean of him but I dumped him shortly after. He was too arrogant,” Jane confessed of her ex. The mistake Jane’s ex made was trying to be nice and at the same time smug and too hot, acting like he was doing her a favour dating her. Being nice applies to chicks as well. Don’t gossip about him and tell of his dirty laundry to friends, respect him, be understanding when he’s too broke to take you out, be supportive in both studies and future plans, defend him even when the girls claim he’s a pygmy, Ofwono, too skinny, fat, not cool, weird etc.

Keeping in touch and having fun are vital elements. Nowadays, phones are common cheap stuff and the easiest way of communication. Like in any other relationship, communication is vital so if the phone is prohibited at shule, just write or email him/her as often as you can. As long as one is not too demanding, or jealous, things will be cool, fun and stress-free.