Creating good habits that stick

For a long time, I told myself that I did not like writing. Honestly, it did not energise me at all. Even in school, I took notes not because I loved it, but because we had to. In certain cases, if one did not have notes, this resulted in punishment. 

Anyways, about a year ago I was asked to contribute as a writer to this column and my first response was, “writing is not for me”. Over the years, I had cultivated a habit of saying “I do not like writing”.

Now it was time to retell my story because I had just been given an opportunity to add value to people through writing. When I stopped telling my mind this story of not liking writing, everything changed. 

What about you? What habits have you wanted to create but may have created a story that is stopping you from progressing?

In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear provides a comprehensive, practical guide on how to change our habits and get one percent better every day. It is on purpose to say one percent better every day and not 100 percent better. 

We must realise that creating good habits that stick is not going to happen overnight. For those familiar with compounding interest, you will understand that starting small with consistency will breed success. 

To use my earlier story, now that I have been writing for a year on a more consistent basis, I have cultivated a habit of writing. Am I perfect? Not at all. However, by starting small and being consistent I am now telling myself (self-image) a different story of being a writer.

Now, the question that we need to answer is, how can we create good habits that stick? James Clear highlighted three key lessons from Atomic Habits that we can work at to implement in our lives and create these habits.

The first is start with small habits. It is easy to overestimate the importance of one defining moment and underestimate the value of making small improvements daily. We have heard the saying “one by one makes a bundle”, right? Start small and take baby steps consistently.

Second, set goals that help you focus on the system (process) instead. Last week, we talked about the goal-setting process. When we focus on systems, then it is about the process that leads us to the results we desire. If we are having trouble changing our habits, the problem is not us, the problem is our system. Create systems that will help build good habits. 

Finally, build identity-based habits. Let us create a new identity if we want to build lasting habits. Mine was becoming a writer. Our current behaviours are simply a reflection of our current identity. What we do now is a current mirror image of the type of person we believe to be (either consciously or subconsciously). Who would you like to be or what would you like to be known for?

Decide now what type of person you want to be, then provide yourself with small wins to start. As Buckminster Fuller said, “You never change things by fighting against the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the old model obsolete.” 

I know we can all create good habit that replace the existing ones so that we can progress in the direction we seek to become. 

I believe in you, in virtue and wisdom lead the world.

Mr Jerome Emanzi is a transformational leader Coach with the Maxwell Certified Leadership Team. [email protected]