Prime
What could be holding you back?
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Author: Jerome Emanzi. PHOTO/FILE
What you need to know:
- Most people separate success and failure. However, success and failure are coupled together. The challenge is not to fear making mistakes, but to reduce the mistakes we make earlier in our success journey.
Recently, I was holding a conversation with a mentor of mine about an idea I am partially pursuing. The question my mentor posed to me was, ‘What is holding you back?’
Although this is not the first time this question has come up, this time round it took me by surprise.
In the past weeks’ articles, we talked about the goal setting process and creating good habits that stick. With that awareness, one would think I have a good grasp of how to progress with an idea without hesitation.
However, that is not the case. I am learning that as we work towards our goals, create good habits, pursue ideas, and achieve dreams sometimes there maybe things that could hold us back. What is it that is holding us back?
As we each think through what is holding us back, we can provide answers to that question. If we are being honest with ourselves, I guarantee our responses will contain some sort of excuse and usually that excuse(s) will be tied to a fear. Would you agree?
Using my own experience, when I have an excuse to an idea that would progress my growth, chances are that there is a fear tied to it. I have heard American author John Maxwell say, “There is nothing worse than coming up with a good excuse.”
I find it interesting that it is easy to come up with an excuse, especially when we are facing fear. Let me share a riddle that Maxwell shares about five frogs sitting on a log and four frogs decide to jump off. How many are left?
Five. Why?
Because there is a difference between deciding and actually doing. Often what holds us back from actually doing is because we are afraid of making mistakes. However, mistakes are going to happen. Find me one successful person(s) who will say they did not make mistakes in their success journey.
Most people separate success and failure. However, success and failure are coupled together. The challenge is not to fear making mistakes, but to reduce the mistakes we make earlier in our success journey.
In his book The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, Maxwell talks about growth gaps that we should avoid tripping over and one of these gaps is the mistake gap – “I am afraid of making mistakes”.
Most of us do not enjoy making mistakes. However, in my view, that is the price of admission if we want to improve. To grow, develop, and improve in the direction we seek, requires that we get over any fear of making mistakes.
So, going back to my interaction with my mentor, when I was asked what was holding me back from progressing my idea, I did not have a good answer.
Although I thought of many excuses, I knew better. This prompted me to take a step back and truly reflect on what my actual fears were.
I recalled at a Maxwell leadership event a lesson we were taught regarding five fears that often hold people back from achieving success.
These are the fear of failure, the fear of trading security for the unknown, the fear of being overextended, fear of what others will say or think, and transitioning from accidental growth to intentional growth.
Of these five fears, it was two that were actually holding me back from my idea. That was the fear of failure because it is an area that I am venturing in with minimal experience. The other is the fear of being overextended.
This is mostly due to the fact that I have a young family that is growing, and the demands may seem overwhelming if I continue venturing into this idea.
Revisiting these lessons allowed me to walk through what was holding me back. I am curious, which of the five fears could be holding you back from moving in the direction you seek?
Remember, It is in becoming aware of our fears in any given situation accompanied with actionable steps to overcome what is holding us back that will help push our goals to completion and move us closer to our dreams.
I believe in you, in virtue and wisdom lead the world.
Mr Jerome Emanzi is a transformational leader Coach with the Maxwell Certified Leadership Team. [email protected]