Romantic relationships are often tested by many factors including the pressures of modern life. In such a world, there may not be such a thing as a successful relationship since every season of relationships presents its difficulties. Knowing how to nurture a relationship and deal with its hardships can make it last long. This, however, requires continuous effort and dedication from both partners.
Alice Namara, a relationship counsellor, says it all starts with open and honest communication where partners must create an environment where they feel safe to express their thoughts and feelings.
“This includes discussing both past and present experiences to avoid mistakes that may be detrimental to a new relationship,” she says.
Namara recommends setting aside regular time for meaningful conversations without distractions, “It could be during a date night or on a long phone call. The key is to be present and attentive,” she advises.
Cultivate trust and honesty
Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship. Samuel Kaweesa, a family therapist, says trust is built through consistency and honesty.
“Always keep your promises and be truthful, even when it is difficult,” Kaweesa advises, adding that trust is fragile, and once broken, it can take a long time to rebuild. He also notes that transparency in financial matters, social interactions, and plans helps in fostering trust.
Forgiveness
No relationship is perfect, and conflicts are inevitable. Kaweesa highlights the importance of forgiveness, noting that holding onto grudges and past mistakes only breeds resentment while forgiveness allows both partners to heal and move forward. He suggests that couples should focus on resolving conflicts rather than winning arguments.
“Focus on finding a solution that respects both partners’ feelings and needs,” he tips.
Maintain individual identity
While spending quality time together is crucial, maintaining your own identity and interests is equally important. Beatrice Nakato, a life coach, encourages couples to pursue their passions and hobbies independently.
“Having your own space and time helps you grow as an individual, which in turn enriches the relationship,” she explains, adding that supporting each other’s personal growth can strengthen the bond between partners. This includes celebrating each other’s achievements and being there for them during challenges.
Appreciation and affection
Expressing love and appreciation regularly can go a long way in keeping the relationship vibrant. Namara says small gestures of affection can make a big difference. It could be a simple ‘thank you,’ a hug, or a surprise note. These acts show your partner that you value and care for them. She also recommends celebrating special occasions and creating new memories together to deepen connection.
Cultural values
In Uganda, cultural values and traditions play a significant role in shaping relationships. Nakato emphasises the importance of understanding and respecting each other’s cultural backgrounds. She suggests participating in cultural events and family gatherings as a way of respecting each other’s heritage.
“This creates mutual respect and strengthens the bond between partners, creating a shared cultural experience,” Nakato explains.
Financial harmony
Financial stress is a common issue that can strain relationships. Paul Mugisha, a financial advisor, says couples must have open discussions about money management and financial goals. He recommends creating a budget together and a plan for both short-term and long-term goals.
“Being on the same page financially can reduce stress and prevent conflicts. Couples can do this by setting aside a portion of the budget for joint activities and future investments,” he adds.
Shared goals and vision
This gives couples a sense of purpose and direction. Mugisha encourages couples to dream and plan together. Whether it is starting a family, travelling, or building a home, having common goals strengthens the partnership.
“Couples should regularly review and adjust their goals to ensure they remain aligned and motivated as well as celebrate milestones and achievements together, no matter how small,” he advises.
Balancing technology and personal interaction
In the digital age, technology can both connect and divide partners. Namara warns against letting devices interfere with personal interactions.
“Set boundaries for technology use, especially during quality time. Create tech-free zones or times to ensure you remain present with each other,” she proposes.
Namara recommends using technology positively by sharing interests, such as listening to music together or exploring online courses as a couple.
The power of humour
Laughter and fun are essential elements of a happy relationship. Kaweesa underscores the importance of keeping the relationship light-hearted and joyful.
“Find reasons to laugh together, whether through shared jokes, playful activities, or funny movies. Humour can diffuse tension and bring partners closer,” he says adding that trying new activities together can keep the relationship exciting and adventurous.
Building a supportive community
Whereas having time for introspection is important, a supportive community of friends and family can provide a strong foundation for a relationship, Nakato encourages couples to nurture their social networks.
“Surround yourselves with positive influences and seek support when needed. Having a strong support system can help couples learn ways to navigate challenges and celebrate successes,” she advises.
Embrace change and growth
Relationships, as individuals, evolve. Partners need to recognise that growth is a natural part of life and should support each other through these changes. Namara stresses the importance of embracing change and growth within the relationship.
“This could mean adjusting to new career paths, changing interests, or evolving personal beliefs, “she explains.
She suggests setting regular “growth check-ins” where couples discuss how they have changed and what they need from each other to feel supported.
Conflict resolution strategy
Every couple argues, but how they handle conflicts can determine the health of their relationship. Kaweesa notes that developing a clear strategy for resolving disputes involves understanding each other’s temperaments and agreeing on rules for arguing constructively. This might include taking breaks when things get heated or agreeing to avoid certain hurtful phrases.
“Address conflicts when both partners are calm and able to focus on finding solutions,” he advises.
A healthy relationship is often supported by healthy lifestyles. Namara urges couples to prioritise their physical and mental health by engaging in activities that promote wellness, such as exercising together, cooking healthy meals and supporting each other’s mental health needs. A healthy body and mind can lead to a more fulfilling relationship.
Seek help
Seeking professional help when facing serious issues can be crucial. Many couples wait too long before reaching out for help, which can make problems harder to resolve. Namara advises couples not to hesitate to consult a therapist or counsellor.
‘‘Sometimes, an unbiased third party can provide valuable insights and guidance,’’ she notes.
“Remember, every relationship is unique, and what works for one couple might not work for another. It is essential to find what works best for you and your partner. However, the constant stands; love, patience, and commitment can help overcome the challenges and enjoy a fulfilling relationship,” Samuel Kaweesa, a family therapist, says.
