“Beyond the romantic moments, can you support each other’s dreams and face challenges as a team? Do you have the resilience to weather storms together and emerge stronger? That is what love is about,” says Jackie Deweyi Namataka, a radio and television presenter.
Her idea of love involves knowing it is not just about the butterflies but accepting each other’s flaws. Her commitment to Enock Nsubuga, a salesperson, has been made strong by their ability to forgive and let go of the past, build trust and create a safe space for them to heal. Nsubuga says friendship has been key in helping them create a lasting bond.
“Otherwise, sometimes it becomes very hard to stay together and only that initial friendship will save the day,” he adds.
How they met
Enock and Jackie met in 2010. She was a new radio presenter while he worked at Capital FM. He became her listener, often giving feedback on her radio shows.
“We had mutual friends, but we were just casual acquaintances at first. Then, unexpectedly, we both found ourselves single around the same time. We started spending more time together and supporting each other through life’s changes. It was a natural progression from friendship, attending family events and into something more,” she recounts.
Enock recalls meeting and getting to know a hard-working, elegant woman who he yearned to be friends with. Then, he started making moves that made her suspect he wanted more.
“When he returned from the 2010 World Cup in South Africa, he surprised me with a vuvuzela and chocolate. He also invited me out on a date at a Kafunda near his home,” she recalls, adding that the following day, when he called claiming to be unwell, it was clear he was just looking for an excuse to see her.
Smitten
Enock had fallen in love with Deweyi because she was unique and intelligent and the few times she visited him, she left his house spotless. She was willing to go the extra mile. With time, she started warming up to him. She had fallen in love with his calm and gentle demeanour, coupled with his respectful nature.
“It was impressive how he never spoke ill of his ex, showing an admirable level of maturity. I also appreciated his spontaneity and inclusiveness,” Deweyi says.
Nsubuga often planned fun outings and made sure to invite Deweyi along, even if he was in the company of other friends. His kindness and consideration were qualities she found incredibly endearing.
The lovebirds would always go on a date on Friday and would party till the break of dawn. Those were the days when Tiwa Savage’s song titled ‘Kelekele Love’ was popular. They decided to call each other ‘Kele’ as a nickname.
It did not take long before he professed his love for her. But first, he needed to meet her parents. Her mind received the request with a mixture of excitement and disbelief. She was completely surprised because she had never experienced a Kukyala before.
To make things even more unexpected, she had not told her mother about their relationship. The whole situation was a whirlwind of emotions, to say the least. Enock says his proposal was a natural progression of their relationship. The deeper their bond grew, the clearer it became that he wanted to formalise their commitment by seeking her parents’ blessing.
Challenges
He adds, “It is not just a traditional husband-wife relationship but a collaborative journey through life together.” And it is a bond that has weathered challenges. The couple’s biggest challenge was infertility. They waited 10 years, longing for a child which took a toll on their relationship owing to constant pressure and external opinions that made it difficult to navigate their own emotions.
They often found themselves at odds with each other, mistakenly attributing their disagreements to their inability to conceive. Deweyi is using her personal experience to sensitise others under a social venture called Bumiizo, which is dedicated to providing hope, support and knowledge to individuals and couples navigating the challenges of infertility.
“Having walked this difficult path myself, I am building a safe, supportive community where individuals can share experiences, access reliable information and connect with others who understand infertility struggles,” she explains.
She adds, “There were times I considered ending the relationship so he could have the chance to start a family.”
Ironically, it was during that period of doubt that she discovered she was pregnant with their son, Mufasa. The news, which should have been filled with joy, was initially met with disbelief due to the years of trying.
Now, the couple have two sons, Mufasa and Pendo. Enock says their fertility journey was particularly difficult, with immense pressure from all sides. He believes it was divine intervention that kept them together, adding that although there have been times when it seemed impossible to reconcile their differences, their bond has proven resilient.
Lessons
Deweyi says their infertility challenges taught her the true meaning of perseverance and the power of prayer. It also taught her the value of empathy, as she gained a deeper understanding of individuals facing similar struggles. The experience also deepened their bond as a couple.
“We learnt to communicate openly and honestly about our fears and hopes. It was a painful process, but a test of our love and commitment that ultimately brought us closer,” she says.
Advice
Deweyi’s advice to couples planning to enter into a committed relationship is to know that a successful partnership requires consistent effort and dedication from both individuals.
“You need to understand that not every day will be perfect. There will be tough times but choose to love and support your partner even when it is difficult. Most importantly, the power of prayer and a shared commitment to making the relationship work cannot be overstated,” she says.
Enock says their relationship has worked because mutual admiration has been a cornerstone, and he has always envisioned building a life with her, sharing experiences, and achieving their goals together.
Managing finances has been a delicate and challenging aspect of the lovers’ relationship. They have encountered disagreements and conflicts over money in the past, but they are gradually developing better financial discipline together. It is a work in progress.
